I wrote 2012 on my rent check two months ago, and here we are, 2014.
Another year has sprung upon us and new goals need to be set.
I have used New Year’s resolutions as a bit of a cop out the last few go arounds. 2011 I stopped eating an entire box of cereal for breakfast, 2012 I set the goal of running up every staircase I needed to climb, 2013 I vowed better posture. These were actual goals, ones that I accomplished, but meaningless in the grand scheme of things and obviously, not very challenging. Sure, I don’t have a disgusting eating habit anymore, I force childlike energy into myself when ascending to the second floor of a building and I no longer sit like a caveman, but none of these are life altering.
2014 is another clean slate, an opportunity for change. Make a resolution, even if you think they are dumb, and when asked about it, state you goals. Any other time of year if someone were to ask you point blank what your shortcomings are and how you want to improve, it would be weird, and/or potentially offensive. This is the time to say it out loud and give weight and accountability to everything you want to accomplish.
So while I am going to continue keeping my goals from previous years, I am shooting higher for these next 12 months:

-Be able to hold full conversations in Spanish
-Take classes on coding and real estate (not related in case you were trying to tie these together somehow)

Your turn.


Hey gaywad!

“I guess we are all just a bunch of pussies lost in the big city.”
“I am what I eat.” I responded.

This was a verbatim conversation I had with my dad while on a trip to Chicago. I was 8.
When we are young certain words stick because of who said them, or the response they received. I didn’t know what this meant, but I remember a lifeguard at the pool making this quip and everyone laughed. I wanted to be funny too. The response I got was shock.
We use so many words inaccurately by definition, but have done so in such a consistent manner that they have become contextually accurate.
Obviously the word “gay” comes to mind. Once used as a term to describe someone showing a merry lively mood or happy, it now refers to someone’s sexual orientation. It is also used as a derogatory word to describe anything essentially “not cool”.
“Gay” is not the only word that has swapped definitions from positive to negative or vice versa.
“Awful” used to mean “full of awe” or “inspiring wonder”, positive to negative.
“Bully” was originally used as an endearing term used for loved ones, another positive to negative.
Calling someone “Nice” was at one point the equivalent of telling someone they are a fool, negative to positive.
Most of these meanings changed a long time ago, but we have a few words currently used with dual meanings at opposite ends of the spectrum, and I wonder about their future.
For instance “sick” and “ill” have become slang terms for anything really cool (also two meanings) and if those are to be removed from the negative category as in “afflicted with poor health or disease” and only used as in “great or amazing”, then what are we going to call actual sick or ill people in the future?
“Spam” is still a disgusting meat, how long until that canned snack is gone and “spam” is only your unwanted messages?
Obviously there are lots of other words that fall into this category, and maybe I would need to complete my time machine to see how this plays out, but words are getting new meanings astronomically faster as our communication lines have sped up. Some really cool kid in Portland could say “This hamburger is bugs!” as he demolishes it with a smile during his 7 second Vine video, and now “bugs” is the new “awesome”.
Basically, I don’t want to feel like an 8 year old again, which at my age equates to not wanting to feel aged or out of the loop. I want to know all meanings of words and the context in which they are said, you know, so I don’t feel like such a old fart.

Click on Inigo Montoya for other interesting words……

We just gave thanks, now what?

“I am thankful for Black Friday.” said someone somewhere in America while sitting at the family Thanksgiving table surrounded by loved ones.
Mere hours after feeling positive about everything we possess in life, Americans jostle in line for more possessions. This is consumerism at its peak, and it kicks off what has come to be known as the “Christmas shopping season”, which I guess is different from the plain old Christmas season?
I like the holidays, I like giving people gifts, but more than anything I like that as a whole, people generally display a kindness that for some reason cannot be carried throughout the rest of the year. But let’s be honest about this, God and Jesus probably hate Christmas.
“Well that transitioned quickly” you might be saying. True, it did, but I want to point out 2 facts that support this potentially outlandish claim.
1. We killed Jesus
Say your child was killed by a hummingbird. As a whole, you might dislike hummingbirds, be a little weary of them, and prefer say, a kitten to a hummingbird. Humans killed Jesus. God created all living things on this Earth, and of all the creatures, it was humans that killed his son. I would imagine that because of this, God prefers pretty much every other species of animal over human.
2. We celebrate Jesus’ birthday on the wrong day
The actual birth date of Jesus isn’t clear, but following what is written in scripture, December 25th is absolutely not the correct day. If you want to know the supporting reasons click here.
It’s a little bit of a slap in the face right, God? I mean, you sent your son down here to help us out, we kill him, and then celebrate his birth on an arbitrary day by giving each other a bunch of items that we only purchased because they were on deep discount.
Also of note is that people are mauled/murdered during the process of buying said discounted items. So what I gather about this Christmas shopping season is that if you really care about someone, nothing says “I love you” like a sweater that is 70% off. Especially if that sweater is stained with the blood of other shoppers.
I prefer plain old Christmas season myself.